Narcissistic relationships can be very difficult to leave due to factors such as trauma bonding. Here are three powerful ways to reframe the relationship in order to break free:
- FANTASY Realise that the image that the Narcissist has created in your eyes is a fantasy. That person does not exist in reality.
MIRROR The narcissist studied you intently so that they were able to portray themselves as a mirror image to you. They do this to create the illusion that they are our soul mates. In reality they are not this dream person that we have been led to believe that they are.- ADVERSARY This was the strongest force that repelled me from past narcissistic partners. In MY mind, the narcissist and I were a team. Not so in the narcissist’s mind! The narcissist sees others as objects that are there to fulfill his / her own needs. The narcissist is an adversary to us. They do NOT have our best needs at heart. They will inevitably try to cause us harm.
- I LOVE YOU When the Narcissist tells us that they love us, it is not because this is how they feel. It is because they WANT something FROM us. The narcissist may also tell us they love us to prompt us to tell them that we love them. This reassures them that they have us under their control and that they are desirable to us.
Once you have decided to leave, it becomes really important to work through your triggers so that you can break free from the ties that keep you bonded to this person.
What helped you to move on from a narcissist? It would be great to hear your comments below.